Read on Twitter
1/19. A thread about "Karens."
I am glad that white people are starting to learn that you can't call the cops on black people because you feel like it or because it bothers you that they are BBQ'ing or walking down the street while black.
I am glad that white people are starting to learn that you can't call the cops on black people because you feel like it or because it bothers you that they are BBQ'ing or walking down the street while black.
2/19. I once had a job with a landscaping company. Clients would hire the company, and then I would walk onto their property to do landscaping without first ringing the doorbell. The clients didn't know me and I was a stranger walking onto their property.
3/19. I was very aware of my white privilege (yes it's real; no it doesn't mean that being white guarantees you an easy life). Aware of the fact that the homeowners were much less likely to call the cops on me (or pull out their guns). The color of my skin protected me from it.
4/19. I have a friend who once did similar work, and I will never forget the stress she described when walking onto strangers' property (especially white wealthy people) while black. I believe it. It must have been awful. She ended up quitting the job and I can understand why.
5/19. The "Karen" meme may be a response to racism, but it's a response that's inflected by sexism. As white ppl reflect on their reactions to black ppl who cause or are imagined to cause minor inconveniences, I hope they (& everyone) will also think abt their reactions to women.
6/19. Many people saw that dude in Seattle yesterday, some guy named Karlos Dillard, a gay black man & wannabe "influencer", who went after a white woman who allegedly gave him the finger and called him the n-word during some traffic incident. He followed her home and doxxed her.
7/19. Turns out that he probably fabricated some details of the story. He has at least two videos where he accuses women of things that are not caught on camera. He has made and sold t-shirts about the incidents. I read that he has a restraining order from at least one woman.
8/19. In short, he's clearly a woman hater; sad but true that gay men can be as misogynistic as any other men. In yesterday's video, he makes a BIG deal out of her giving him the finger and only mentions her calling him the n-word in passing, & only a few minutes into the video.
9/19. I mean, seems to me that the n-word would have been the bigger issue? Different people can have different reactions to the same thing, but when considered alongside the other details (the IG posts, the restraining order), I don't find his version of events to be credible.
10/19. The whole thing reminds of a talk I had with myself about 20 years ago. I don't remember the exact incident, but some woman in public, a stranger, did some minor thing that annoyed me. I remember wanting to confront her and make a big spectacle out of it.
11/19. But I stopped myself and asked myself: would I have "confronted" her if she were a man? The answer was clearly no. My impulse to go after her was because I unconsciously felt that a woman was easier to target because... well, I was a man, and she wasn't.
12/19. Gay or not, I still had unconscious feelings of male power and male supremacy, and she was an easy way for me to show it. Ever since that day 20 years ago, I have actively and consciously tried to be aware of my reactions to women in public (or private) spaces.
13/19. If I want to say or do something to a woman, I ask myself: would I say/do it to a man? Do I seem to believe that a man would challenge me on it, but a woman wouldn't? If the answer is yes, then I should either STFU, OR take a different approach when addressing it.
14/19. Needless to say, while choosing not to harass women in public, I also choose not to harass black people for eating lunch or selling water.
15/19. White ppl who call the cops on poc for nothing need to stop. At the same time, there is a very real danger that the bar for what counts as "Karen" behavior is going get lower & lower, and ppl are going to target women for mundane or fabricated reasons. They already do.
16/19. Misogyny on the left is not new, this is just its latest incarnation. Men who think they're #woke af are going to target women for trivial reasons, and then showcase their misogyny as part of a fight against racism. They are NOT going to target men in the same way.
17/19. So don't do it. Don't target women for trivial or non reasons.
18/19. I want all people to be safe and not harassed in public. As a white man who is not always read as gay, I know that I am much less likely to receive this kind of harassment.
19/19. It IS possible to support black and brown people's right to full participation in public life with safety and dignity, while also supporting this for women. Men and boys need to learn that women are not sponges who are there to absorb your anger.
Fin
Fin
