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This kinda stuff is why so many of us never come forward about abuse. We know, we have to assess our reputation as people and think "will people believe me, or will they find a reason to discredit me?"
When you're "problematic", people look for reasons to discredit your trauma.
When you're "problematic", people look for reasons to discredit your trauma.
I've been sexually abused by two people in the community and I can't talk about it because i know the company they keep and i know that things like my feral art and previous callouts will be leveraged against me. People like us know what we're against if we talk.
When you're a trauma survivor, if you explore your trauma AT ALL through art or sexuality you get scrutinized. People into BDSM, people who make "problematic" art, etc. People look for reasons to not believe you, or how to deduce that you were probably at fault for what happened.
If you wanna talk about it, you have to weigh your options. Who are your abuser's friends? Do they have well-known friends? How "clean" is their web presence vs yours? Because the same people who tout "trust survivors" will turn on you if the abuser is their friend.
People who call themselves "kind" will ignore you, because you're seen as a liability. People who call themselves "kind" will take your abuser's side. They scour your web presence to see what they can use against you. They'll try to silence you because listening involves change.
And to change involves empathizing with someone they see as "bad". To care for someone who draws or does something they don't like is to admit that these people are human, and can be hurt, and are affected by hurting, and to admit that they are capable of hurting them too.
To have to look at survivors and believe them in the face of what you see as their "badness" involves assessing how you have treated them, and accepting their humanity, and as you can see by OP, often people would much rather deny believing survivors than see them as human.
