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Funny story about doctors. When I was in highschool I was like. Pretty obviously not okay. I was not in any way "masking" my mental illness well. I saw both family physician and school counselor and school therapist. All diagnoses and solutions presented were based on weight loss
Like the family physician ran tests, found my levels were basically within normal, and put me on hypothyroid meds saying it might help me lose weight.
Depression symptoms? Well of course, I'm fat. I need to lose weight.
Y'all I have been in such manic states I have been having auditory hallucinations and no medical professional (whenever I could afford to see one once I lost my parents insurance) put me on meds until I was taken to the ER saying I was going to kill myself.
Possibly. POSSIBLY. Possibly pretending that doctors know what a patient is experiencing better than patients contributes to a culture where a doctor's biases go unquestioned to the point of harming patients.
Here's another fucked up part of it: I totally bought that lie the culture tells to the point I was blaming myself. Like "you're not REALLY mentally ill, your brain is just worthless" like HOW DOES THIS LOGIC EVEN MAKE SENSE IN HINDSIGHT
Hilariously my estranged dad is a psych nurse and people act like that means he has some special insight into mentally ill people and like PLEASE, he lived under a roof with me for EIGHTEEN YEARS.
He went to community college and now does intakes with cops, he didn't gain any psychic powers or whatever, but people act like HE'S going to understand my mental illness better than ME, THE PERSON WHO HAS IT AND WHO HE HAS NEVER UNDERSTOOD
Anyway we hero worship medical workers, especially those in the mental health field, in ways that I think are extremely fucking uncomfortable to witness as a mentally ill person.
