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This is a very very good thread. I agree with the central claim, though I suspect we have very different points of departure.
I appreciate the fact that you were able to distinguish between good patriarchy and bad patriarchy. There was no call to smash the patriarchy. https://twitter.com/TheOblongata/status/1345747403970912264
I appreciate the fact that you were able to distinguish between good patriarchy and bad patriarchy. There was no call to smash the patriarchy. https://twitter.com/TheOblongata/status/1345747403970912264
Which would be tantamount to smash human nature and biological realities – things exist for a reason [beyond ego and malevolence]. Doesn’t make it inherently good or bad.
I also like the fact that you acknowledged the limitations of mothers. Women cannot turn boys into men.
There are numerous studies over the last 50 years that highlight the impact of fatherlessness on children’s outcomes. Especially boys.
There are numerous studies over the last 50 years that highlight the impact of fatherlessness on children’s outcomes. Especially boys.
This proves that mothers and fathers are not interchangeable, contrary to gender neutral society advocates. Thus, what a father offers his son is not only different in degree but in kind. The father is extremely important as he is the guide that shows the boy that there is
nothing wrong with being competitive, strong, courageous, taking risks, dominant and assertive.
The boys natural inclinations are not to be shamed but tutored. To the degree that toxic masculinity has legitimacy, it is merely a manifestation of untutored masculinity.
The boys natural inclinations are not to be shamed but tutored. To the degree that toxic masculinity has legitimacy, it is merely a manifestation of untutored masculinity.
Fathers must take this very seriously.
Men exist simultaneously in two realms. The realm of women and the realm of men. The rules that govern each realm are very different. What is effective in one realm will often be detrimental in the other.
Men exist simultaneously in two realms. The realm of women and the realm of men. The rules that govern each realm are very different. What is effective in one realm will often be detrimental in the other.
Women cannot define masculinity beyond what they want from men [ie the realm of women]
It is for this reason in contemporary times we only get a one dimensional image of SAW. SAW was the manifestation of perfect balance between Jamaal and Jalaal- this is what we should strive for
It is for this reason in contemporary times we only get a one dimensional image of SAW. SAW was the manifestation of perfect balance between Jamaal and Jalaal- this is what we should strive for
However most contemporary portrayals of him focus on the former.
They fail to see that fixating only on the Jamaal, inhibits a boy from properly integrating his natural Jalaali attributes. After all he was Insan al Kamil – the perfect/complete man.
They fail to see that fixating only on the Jamaal, inhibits a boy from properly integrating his natural Jalaali attributes. After all he was Insan al Kamil – the perfect/complete man.
It is true that SAW has commanded men to be kind to their wives but seldom do we hear that he told wives to obey their husbands.[Yes, there are limits]
It is true that SAW was romantic and played with his wives but seldom do we hear that he was also firm with them and enforced..
It is true that SAW was romantic and played with his wives but seldom do we hear that he was also firm with them and enforced..
boundaries – Even giving them ultimatums.
In short, I agree 100 percent with the importance of Fathers and the need for men to do better in this regard.
However, in my experience listening to modern women, they do not in fact really believe in ‘good’ patriarchy, ...
In short, I agree 100 percent with the importance of Fathers and the need for men to do better in this regard.
However, in my experience listening to modern women, they do not in fact really believe in ‘good’ patriarchy, ...
thus they can be subversive. It is akin to a buffet, where pick and mix is the order of the day.
Modern women claim to want very deep, emotional intimate relationships that are predicated on interdependence. On the other hand they are fiercely committed autonomy
Modern women claim to want very deep, emotional intimate relationships that are predicated on interdependence. On the other hand they are fiercely committed autonomy
Thus they seek to be simultaneously autonomous and interdependent. Or they believe hierarchy precludes mutuality. etc
However, I concede that men introduced them to this pick and mix mentality. Thus the ultimate solutions also lie with us.
Good thread.
However, I concede that men introduced them to this pick and mix mentality. Thus the ultimate solutions also lie with us.
Good thread.
