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Here's my story on this. When I moved to the Northeast, everyone in my hometown in Kentucky wailed about how mean everyone would be to me and how awful it would be. I never found that to be true. People were kind/nice but in a different way. /1 https://twitter.com/jordonaut/status/1352363163686068226
On one of my first weeks in NYC during my postdoc, I wanted to take a bus uptown to visit a friend at Sloan-Kettering for lunch. Having never lived in a town with public transportation, I didn't know how to do this. /2
My friend said, "It's simple! Make sure you have $1.50 - exact change - and take the M to this stop." So I'm nervous, but I have a PhD, I think, so surely I can do this. I go to the bus stop and the correct bus pulls up. I'm feeling excited because it is going well. /3
I get on the bus and try to hand the driver my dollar bill and two quarters. He looks at me like I am insane. The line of people behind me all sigh loudly. The person behind me says in a tired voice, "Give me the money and I'll swipe you in on my Metro card." /4
She sounded like I was asking her to carry me up town, but she did it. Kind, but not "nice". I get uptown for lunch and my friend laughs for 15 minutes at this story which I can see is funny. We have a great time, and I make sure I have 6 quarters for the bus back. /5
I'm feeling all professional public transit user now so I go to the stop and happily wait for the bus. The bus with the correct letter pulls up and I go to step on it, and this HUGE guy grabs the back of my jacket and says, "Lady, you don't want that bus." /6
He literally pulls me off the bus step. My heart is in my throat. He says gruffly, "That's the local. You want the express." This is said in a tone that implies I am too stupid to ride a bus. But I said, "Thank you,". He grinned and walked off. /7
How did he, correctly, know I needed the express? I don't know. Maybe this was the equivalent of a NYC public transportation fairy. But it was also kind in an odd NYC way, but not particularly nice. /8
I always tell people who ask about the East Coast that the people are wonderful and really kind, just not the same way you might expect. Everyone should live somewhere really different from where they grew up at least once just to experience different ways of being kind. /9x
Addendum - I can't speak to the sweeping characterization of the West Coast, because I've never lived there. Nor am I saying the entire East Coast is New York. Kind/Nice in Vermont is different than Kind/Nice in St. Louis. That's what I am commenting on.
